7 The Repayment ‘Hardest to Bear'

第七章 “义理最难忍受”

‘GIRI,' runs the Japanese saying, is ‘hardest to bear.' A person must repay giri as he must repay gimu, but it is a series of obligations of a different color. There is no possible English equivalent and of all the strange categories of moral obligations which anthropologists find in the culture of the world, it is one of the most curious. It is specifically Japanese. Both chu and ko Japan shares with China and in spite of the changes she has made in these concepts they have certain family likeness to moral imperatives familiar in other Eastern nations. But giri she owes to no Chinese Confucianism and to no Oriental Buddhism. It is a Japanese category and it is not possible to understand their courses of action without taking it into account. No Japanese can talk about motivations or good repute or the dilemmas which confront men and women in his home country without constantly speaking of giri.

日本常言道：“义理最难忍受。”一个人要像报答“义务”一样报答“义理”，但“义理”却是与“义务”完全不同的一系列义务。对此英语中没有适当的词，它是人类文化学者发现的世界文化奇怪的道德义务范畴中最奇特的，是日本独有的。日本的“忠”和“孝”都是与中国共有的，除开它对这些观念所做的改造外，这些概念毕竟与其他东方国家有的道德观念存在某种程度的共同之处。但是“义理”既非中国孔孟之道的产物，又非源自东方佛教。它是一种日本的概念，如果不对它加以考察，就不可能理解他们的行为方针。日本人在谈到他们行为的动机、名声及在国内与其他人冲突而陷入进退两难的境地时，总是把“义理”挂在嘴边。

To an Occidental, giri includes a most heterogeneous list of obligations (see chart on?p. 116) ranging from gratitude for an old kindness to the duty of revenge. It is no wonder that the Japanese have not tried to expound?giri to Westerners; their own all-Japanese dictionaries can hardly define it. One of these renders it—I translate:—‘righteous way; the road human beings should follow; something one does unwillingly to forestall apology to the world.' This does not give a Westerner much idea of it but the word ‘unwillingly' points up a contrast with gimu. Gimu, no matter how many difficult demands it makes upon a person, is at least a group of duties he owes within the immediate circle of his intimate family and to the Ruler who stands as a symbol for his country, his way of life, and his patriotism. It is due to persons because of strong ties drawn tight at his very birth. However unwilling specific acts of compliance may be, gimu is never defined as ‘unwilling.' But ‘repaying giri' is full of malaise. The difficulties of being a debtor are at their maximum in ‘the circle of giri.'

菊与刀在西方人看来，“义理”是一个包罗万象的义务（参见第六章一览表），从对一件很久以前恩惠的回报，直至报复的义务。这就是为什么日本人从未试图向西方人解释“义理”的原因，因为就连他们自己的日语大字典都很难对之下个定义。据某日本词典的说明，所谓“义理”是“正确的方法；人们应该遵从的道路；为应付社会交往，不情愿但又不得不做的事情”。这并不能使西方人对之有个清楚的认识，但其中的“不情愿”则说明了它与“义务”的区别。“义务”不论使某人承担多少困难的要求，但毕竟是他对其直系家庭有关范围之内的一系列责任以及对他的国家、他的生活方式及他的爱国主义象征的天皇的义务；这是人们应该承担的，因为他从出生之日起这些就与他紧紧联系起来了。尽管履行某些特别的事也是不情愿的，但是“义务”决不能被解释为“不情愿的东西”。然而“报答义理”却是充满不愉快的事情。债务者的难处在“义理范围”达到了极点。

Giri has two quite distinct divisions. What I shall call ‘giri to the world'—literally ‘repaying giri'—is one's obligation to repay?on?to one's fellows, and what I shall call ‘giri to one's name' is the duty of keeping one's name and reputation unspotted by any imputation, somewhat after the fashion of German ‘honor.' Giri to the world can roughly be described as the fulfillment of contractual relations—as contrasted with gimu which is felt as the fulfillment of intimate obligations to which one is born. Thus giri includes all the duties one owes to one's in-law's family; gimu, those to one's own immediate family. The term for father-in-law is father-in-giri; mother-in-law is mother-in-giri, and brother- and sister-in-law are brother-in-giri and sister-in-giri. This terminology is used either for spouse's sibling or for sibling's spouse. Marriage in Japan is of course a contract between?families and carrying out these contractual obligations throughout life to the opposite family is ‘working for giri.' It is heaviest toward the generation which arranged the contract—the parents—and heaviest of all on the young wife toward her mother-in-law because, as the Japanese say, the bride has gone to live in a house where she was not born. The husband's obligations to his parents-in-law are different, but they too are dreaded, for he may have to lend them money if they are in distress and must meet other contractual responsibilities. As one Japanese said, ‘If a grown son does things for his own mother, it is because he loves her and therefore it couldn't be giri. You don't work for giri when you act from the heart.' A person fulfills his duties to his in-laws punctiliously, however, because at all costs he must avoid the dreaded condemnation: ‘a man who does not know giri.'

“义理”有两类。一类是“对社会的义理”，即“报答的义理”，是人对同辈报答的义务；另一类是“对个人名义的义理”，是维护自己名声的义务，使名义不受任何蔑视和玷污，这与德国人的“荣誉”的风尚有些相似。对社会的“义理”可以笼统地概括为履行契约关系的责任，这与“义务”所不同的是后者被认为是履行与自己有血缘关系的义务。因此“义理”包括法律上对自己家族和姻亲家族的全部职责，“义务”则是对自己直系亲属的一切义务。法律上的父亲称为“义理”之父，法律上的母亲则称为“义理”之母，法律上的兄弟姐妹则称为“义理”的兄弟姐妹。这套修辞既可以指配偶的亲属，也可以指亲属的配偶。日本的婚姻无疑还是家庭之间的契约，一生对对方家庭履行这些契约义务就是“尽义理”。“义理”主要是对负责缔约的一代，即对双方家长的，负担最重的是年轻的妻子对她婆婆的“义理”，因为她是到与娘家不同的别人家去，她必须在那里生活。丈夫对他岳父岳母的义务就不同了，虽然他也很为难，因为他有时不得不在他们困难时借钱给他们，而且还要面临其他契约关系的责任。正如一位日本人所说：“长大成人的儿子为母亲做事是因为他爱母亲，因此这不是义理，心甘情愿去做的事就不是义理。”但是，人们仍小心谨慎地履行对亲家的义务，因为他无论如何不愿落上一个可怕的罪名：“不懂义理的人。”

The way they feel about this duty to the in-law family is vividly clear in the case of the ‘adopted husband,' the man who is married after the fashion of a woman. When a family has daughters and no sons the parents choose a husband for one of their daughters in order to carry on the family name. His name is erased from the register of his own family and he takes his father-in-law's name. He enters his wife's home, is subject ‘in giri' to his father- and mother-in-law, and when he dies is buried in their burying ground. In all these acts he follows the exact pattern of the woman in the usual marriage. The reasons for adopting a husband for one's daughter may not be simply the absence of a son of one's own; often it is a deal out of which both sides hope to gain. These are called ‘political marriages.' The girl's?family may be poor but of good family and the boy may bring ready cash and in return move up in the class hierarchy. Or the girl's family may be wealthy and able to educate the husband who in return for this benefit signs away his own family. Or the girl's father may in this way associate with himself a prospective partner in his firm. In any case, an adopted husband's giri is especially heavy—as is proper because the act of changing a man's name to another family register is drastic in Japan. In feudal Japan he had to prove himself in his new household by taking his adopted father's side in battle, even if it meant killing his own father. In modern Japan the ‘political marriages' involving adopted husbands invoke this strong sanction of giri to tie the young man to his father-in-law's business or family fortunes with the heaviest bonds the Japanese can provide. Especially in Meiji times this was sometimes advantageous to both parties. But resentment at being an adopted husband is usually violent and a common Japanese saying is ‘If you have three?go?of rice (about a pint), never be an adopted husband.' The Japanese say this resentment is ‘because of the giri.' They do not say, as Americans probably would if we had a like custom, ‘because it keeps him from playing a man's role.' Giri is hard enough anyway and ‘unwilling' enough, so that ‘because of the giri' seems to the Japanese a sufficient statement of the burdensome relation.

第七章“义理最难忍受”履行他们对姻亲家庭的义理，这种感觉对“上门女婿”来说感触最深，这是指男方婚后住在女方家里。在那些只有女儿没有儿子的家庭里，父母常为其中一个女儿选择丈夫，使家庭的姓氏有人继承。他登记时去掉自己的姓，改用岳父的姓，住到妻子家，“义理上”服从岳父母。他死后也葬在这个家庭的墓地。他做的所有这些事都完全是普通婚姻中妇女所做的事。招婿上门的原因有时不只是因为自己家没有儿子，还时常是考虑双方的利益交易，这类事被称为“政略结婚”。姑娘的家庭可能是破落的名门世家，小伙子的家可能手头宽绰，但希望能提高些地位；或许姑娘的家庭较富有，能提供丈夫的教育费用，他为了这些好处就放弃自己的家姓；也有可能是姑娘的父亲想用这一方法为自己的公司赢得一位有为的合伙经营人。不论属于哪种情况，上门女婿的“义理”都特别繁重，这也是正常的，因为把男人姓氏改成另外一家的做法在日本是很非同小可的事。在封建时期的日本，他为了向新的家族证明自己是其中的一员，如果岳父与父亲发生矛盾，他必须站在岳父一边，以至于杀死自己的亲生父亲。在现代日本“政略结婚”是日本人所能找到的最有力的纽带，通过“义理”这种对上门女婿的强有力的约束力，把这个年轻人与他的岳父的事业或家庭幸福联系起来；特别是在明治时期，这种做法更使双方各得其利。但是，对成为上门女婿的嫌恶之情也是很强烈的，日本人有句俗话是：“只要还有三升米，千万别当上门婿。”日本人说，这种怨言“都怪义理”。他们认为美国人如果也有类似的习惯的话也会这样说，但他们不说“因为男子汉不能像男子汉一样行动” 。总之，“义理”的确是十分难受的，十分令人“不情愿”，所以用日本人说的“都怪义理”这句怨言来描述这种使人厌烦的关系，看起来是很恰当的语言。

Not only duties to one's in-laws are giri; duties even to uncles and aunts and nephews and nieces are in the same category. The fact that in Japan duties to even such relatively close relatives do not rank as filial piety (ko) is one of?the great differences in family relations between Japan and China. In China, many such relatives, and much more distant ones, would share pooled resources, but in Japan they are giri or ‘contractual' relatives. The Japanese point out that it often happens that these persons have never personally done a favor (on) for the person who is asked to come to their aid; in helping them he is repaying?on?to their common ancestors. This is the sanction behind caring for one's own children too—which of course is a gimu—but even though the sanction is the same, assistance to these more distant relatives rates as giri. When one has to help them, as when one helps one's in-laws, one says, ‘I am tangled with giri.'

不仅对姻亲的义务属于“义理”，对叔父母、伯父母和堂兄弟姐妹们也划归此类。在日本，对这些相对较近亲戚的义务并不包括在孝悌范围之内，这一情况是日本家庭关系与中国家庭关系中一个很大的不同。在中国，不但许多这种亲戚，甚至更多的较远亲戚都要分享共有资源，但在日本这些都是“义理”或“契约”关系。日本人指出，通常，这些人本身从未对他们前去要求帮助的人做过什么好事（恩），帮助他们也只是对他们和自己共同的祖先报答“恩义”。虽然抚养自己的孩子也源出于同一动机，但这当然是属于一种“义务”；而资助这些远亲尽管动机一样，却只能作为“义理”。如果有人不得不帮助了他们，他就像帮助了姻亲一样会说：“义理在身啊。”

The great traditional giri relationship which most Japanese think of even before the relation with in-laws, is that of a retainer to his liege lord and to his comrades at arms. It is the loyalty a man of honor owes to his superior and to his fellows of his own class. This obligation of giri is celebrated in a vast traditional literature. It is identified as the virtue of the samurai. In old Japan, before the unification of the country effected by the Tokugawas, it was often considered a greater and dearer virtue even than chu, which was at that time the obligation to the Shogun. When in the twelfth century a Minamoto Shogun demanded of one of the daimyo the surrender of an enemy lord he was sheltering, the daimyo wrote back a letter which is still preserved. He was deeply resentful of the imputation upon his giri and he refused to offend against it even in the name of chu. ‘Public affairs,' he wrote, ‘(are a thing) over which I have little personal control but giri between men of honor is?an eternal verity' which transcended the Shogun's authority. He refused ‘to commit a faithless act against his honored friends.'*?This transcendent samurai virtue of old Japan suffuses great numbers of historical folktales which are known today all over Japan and are worked up into?noh?dramas,?kabuki?theater and?kagura?dances.

比一般日本人的姻亲关系更重要的“义理”关系，是武士对主君及其同僚的关系。那些把名誉当做生命的人，认为他对他的长辈、上级或同等级的同辈尽忠节是“义理”。这种“义理”的义务在浩繁的传统文艺作品中最受推崇，它被称为武士的一种美德。在德川家康统一日本之前，它甚至被标榜为比“忠”更伟大更可敬的品质，而当时“忠”是对于将军的。在十二世纪时，源氏将军曾要求他的一个大名将其隐匿的敌方首领交出来，这位大名写的回信被保存了下来。他深恐在“义理”上损坏了自己的名誉，哪怕是为了“忠”的缘故也不愿这样做。他写道：“公事实难违。然重名誉是武士共同之义理，此乃永远不变之真理。”这说明“义理”超过将军的权威。他拒绝做“对尊敬的朋友背信弃义的事” 引自朝河贯一：《入来院文书》，1929年。。这种旧时日本武士的至高美德至今在日本仍老幼皆知，人们把许多的历史传说加工、润色，使其普遍成为能乐剧、歌舞伎以及神乐舞蹈的题材。

One of the best known of these is the tale of the huge invincible?ronin?(a lordless samurai who lives by his own wits), the hero Benkei of the twelfth century. Entirely without resources but of miraculous strength he terrorizes the monks when he takes shelter in the monasteries and cuts down every passing samurai in order to make a collection of their swords to pay for outfitting himself in feudal fashion. Finally he challenges what appears to him to be a mere youngster, a slight and foppish lord. But in him he meets his match and discovers that the youth is the scion of the Minamotos who is scheming to recover the Shogunate for his family. He is indeed that beloved Japanese hero, Yoshitsune Minamoto. To him Benkei gives his passionate giri and undertakes a hundred exploits in his cause. At last, however, they have to escape with their followers from an overwhelming enemy force. They disguise themselves as monkish pilgrims traveling over Japan to collect subscriptions for a temple and to escape detection Yoshitsune dresses as one of the troop while Benkei assumes its headship. They run into a guard the enemy has set along their path and Benkei fabricates for them a long list of temple ‘subscribers' which he pretends to read from his scroll. The enemy almost lets them pass. At the last moment, however,?their suspicions are aroused by the aristocratic grace of Yoshitsune which he cannot conceal even in his disguise as an underling. They call back the troop. Benkei immediately takes a step which completely clears Yoshitsune from suspicion: he berates him on some trivial issue and strikes him across the face. The enemy is convinced; it is beyond possibility that if this pilgrim is Yoshitsune, one of his retainers should lift his hand against him. It would be an unimaginable breach of giri. Benkei's impious act saves the lives of the little band. As soon as they are in safe territory, Benkei throws himself at Yoshitsune's feet and asks him to slay him. His lord graciously offers pardon.

这些传说中最家喻户晓的一个是十二世纪的无敌“浪人”（没有主君、凭自己的才能流浪为生的武士）弁庆的故事。豪杰弁庆除了一身无穷的力气之外一无所有，他到寺庙里借住却吓跑了和尚。他战胜了所有路过的武士，按照封建时的风尚用他们的刀装饰自己。最后，他向看起来不过是瘦弱纨绔公子式的毛头小伙子挑战，但这一次他可碰上了对手。他发现这个青年是正准备夺回政权地位的源氏的后代，也就是很受日本人爱戴的英雄源义经。弁庆对他贡献出了最热忱的“义理”，为他身经百战。然而最后他们和其他部下必须逃出敌人的重兵包围。他们化装成游方日本四国的香客，借口为修庙募捐。为了不被识破，源义经穿着普通的服装，弁庆则装成带队的。当他们碰到敌人布下的岗哨时，弁庆故意拿出一份伪造的建庙的“施主”名单卷册念给岗哨听。敌人几乎放过他们了，但是在最后关头，源义经的贵族仪态就是穿上了平民的衣服也掩饰不住，他们被怀疑又被叫回来。弁庆立即采取了一个行动打消了敌人对源义经的怀疑：他破口大骂源义经，还打了他一个嘴巴。这一下敌人相信了，认为这个香客不可能是源义经，因为他怎能挨家臣的打呢！这样的举动严重地违背了“义理”。弁庆的冒犯举动救了全队的生命。他们刚一脱离危险，弁庆就跪在源义经面前请求处死自己，源义经则慷慨地饶恕了他。

These old tales of times when giri was from the heart and had no taint of resentment are modern Japan's daydream of a golden age. In those days, the tales tell them, there was no ‘unwillingness' in giri. If there was conflict with chu, a man could honorably stick by giri. Giri then was a loved face-to-face relation dressed in all the feudal trimmings. To ‘know giri' meant to be loyal for life to a lord who cared for his retainers in return. To ‘repay giri' meant to offer even one's life to the lord to whom one owed everything.

这些古老传说中的“义理”是心甘情愿的，没有一点怨恨，这对现代日本来说那是一种梦幻式的黄金时代。传说告诉他们，那些时代的“义理”如果与“忠”发生矛盾，人们仍然能高尚地忠于“义理”。因此，“义理”是在各种封建习俗中最受欢迎的直接关系。“懂义理”是指一生忠于一个主人，主人反过来也照顾他的家臣。“报答义理”是指为了报答给予自己一切的主人不惜牺牲自己的生命。

This is, of course, a fantasy. Feudal history in Japan tells of plenty of retainers whose loyalty was bought by the daimyo on the opposite side of the battle. Still more important, as we shall see in the next chapter, any slur the lord cast upon his retainer could properly and traditionally make the retainer leave his service and even enter into negotiations with the enemy. Japan celebrates the vengeance theme with as much delight as she celebrates loyalty to the death. And they were both giri; loyalty was giri to one's lord and?vengeance for an insult was giri to one's name. In Japan they are two sides to the same shield.

这当然只是一种理想化的状态。事实上，日本封建历史上有许多家臣的忠诚被敌方的大名所收买。此外更重要的一点，即我们将在下一章谈到的，任何主人如果蔑视他的家臣，按道理或按传统都可能使家臣离开主人，甚至与敌人结盟。日本就像歌颂忠贞不渝那样高度赞扬复仇，忠诚和复仇都属于“义理”：忠诚是对主人的“义理”；受侮辱时复仇则是对自己名誉的“义理”。在日本，这两者是相辅相成的。

Nevertheless the old tales of loyalty are pleasant daydreams to the Japanese today for now ‘repaying giri' is no longer loyalty to one's legitimate chieftain but is fulfilling all sorts of obligations to all sorts of people. Today's constantly used phrases are full of resentment and of emphasis on the pressure of public opinion which compels a person to do giri against his wishes. They say, ‘I am arranging this marriage merely for giri'; ‘merely because of giri I was forced to give him the job'; ‘I must see him merely for giri.' They constantly talk of being ‘tangled with giri,' a phrase the dictionary translates as ‘I am obliged to it.' They say, ‘He forced me with giri,' ‘he cornered me with giri,' and these, like the other usages, mean that someone has argued the speaker into an act he did not want or intend by raising some issue of payment due upon an?on. In peasant villages, in transactions in small shops, in high circles of the Zaibatsu and in the Cabinet of Japan, people are ‘forced with giri' and ‘cornered with giri.' A suitor may do this by taxing his prospective father-in-law with some old relationship or transaction between the two families or a man may use this same weapon to get a peasant's land. The man who is being ‘cornered' will himself feel he must comply; he says, ‘If I do not hold the shoulder of my ow-man (man from whom I received?on), my giri is in bad repute.' All these usages carry the implication of unwillingness and of compliance for ‘mere decency's sake,' as the Japanese dictionary phrases it.

然而，关于忠诚的古老传说只是现代日本人的美好回忆，因为现在的“报答义理”不再是对自己的正统领导的忠诚，而是对各式各样的人履行各式各样的义务。今天常常听到充满抱怨的说法，特别针对公众舆论强迫人们违背他们的意愿完成“义理”的压力。他们说“我完全出于义理才答应这门婚事”、“要不是为了义理我才不给他这份工作呢”、“为了义理我才去见他的”。他们经常谈到被“义理缠身”，这句话如果按字典解释就是“我出于被迫才做的”。他们说“他用义理压我”、“他用义理逼我”，这两句话也和别的说法一样，指某人迫使谈话的人做他不愿做的事时，故意提到过去对他的“恩”，要他报答。不论在农舍乡村、小买卖店、上层财阀圈子内，还是日本内阁里，人们处处受到“义理强迫”或 “义理围攻”。求婚者可以用两家的旧关系或两个家庭之间的交易作为借口逼迫他将来的岳父；有人用同样的武器可以夺得另一个农民的土地。“受逼迫”的人感到他不得不那样做，他会说：“如果我不承担责任报答我的‘恩’人，我的信义就丧失了。”但所有这些话中都流露出不情愿的样子，正如日英词典所说；“只是为了体面”而尽“义理”。

The rules of giri are strictly rules of required repayment;?they are not a set of moral rules like the Ten Commandments. When a man is forced with giri, it is assumed that he may have to override his sense of justice and they often say, ‘I could not do right (gi) because of giri.' Nor do the rules of giri have anything to do with loving your neighbor as yourself; they do not dictate that a man shall act generously out of the spontaneity of his heart. A man must do giri, they say, because, ‘if he does not, people will call him “a person who does not know giri” and he will be shamed before the world.' It is what people will say that makes it so necessary to comply. Indeed, ‘giri to the world' often appears in English translation as ‘conformity to public opinion,' and the dictionary translates ‘It can't be helped because it is giri to the world' as ‘People will not accept any other course of action.'

“义理”的规矩严格要求必须报答，它们不像《十戒》那样是一系列道德规范。一个人如果受迫于“义理”，就意味着他可能必须克服他的正义感，他们常说：“因为义理，顾不得正义了。”按照“义理”的规定你也无法像爱自己一样爱你的邻人。他们不要求人们发自真心的宽大行为，只要求人们按“义理”去做。他们说：“如果谁不愿这样做，别人就会叫他‘不懂义理的人’，他就没脸见人了。”正是顾虑别人会批评才使人必须做到不可。因而“对社会的义理”常被译成英语的“遵从公众舆论”；而把字典上的“由于是对社会的义理，所以必须履行”，翻译成“人们别无他择的行为准则”。

It is in this ‘circle of giri' that the parallel with American sanctions on paying money one has borrowed helps us most to understand the Japanese attitude. We do not consider that a man has to pay back the favor of a letter received or a gift given or of a timely word spoken with the stringency that is necessary in keeping up his payments of interest and his repayment of a bank loan. In these financial dealings bankruptcy is the penalty for failure—a heavy penalty. The Japanese, however, regard a man as bankrupt when he fails in repaying giri and every contact in life is likely to incur giri in some way or other. This means keeping an account of little words and acts Americans throw lightly about with no thought of incurring obligations. It means walking warily in a complicated world.

与这个“义理范畴”相当的美国人偿还所借债务的观念最有助于我们理解日本人的做法。我们美国人认为一个人不必报答收到一封信，或者收到一件礼物、一句恭维话的好处，但是必须如数地偿还利息及银行借款。在这类金融交易中，破产就是用来惩罚失职的，是最严厉的惩罚。但是日本人把不能偿还“义理”的人看做破产者，而且生活中的各种接触都随时可能以某种方式导致“义理”。这就意味着对美国人随意地而不会引起什么责任的那些行为和言谈，日本人则要天天记在账上，也就意味着在一个错综复杂的社会里谨慎处世。

There is another parallel between Japanese ideas of giri?to the world and American ideas of repaying money. Repayment of giri is thought of as repayment of an exact equivalent. In this giri is quite unlike gimu, which can never be even approximately satisfied no matter what one does. But giri is not unlimited. To American eyes the repayments are fantastically out of proportion to the original favor but that is not the way the Japanese see it. We think their gift giving is fantastic too, when twice a year every household wraps up something in ceremonious fashion as return on a gift received six months earlier, or when the family of one's maidservant brings gifts through the years as a return on the favor of hiring her. But the Japanese taboo returning gifts with larger gifts. It is no part of one's honor to return ‘pure velvet.' One of the most disparaging things one can say about a gift is that the giver has ‘repaid a minnow with a sea bream (a large fish).' So too in repaying giri.

日本的对社会讲“义理”的观念与美国的偿还借债之间还有一个相似之处，即报答“义理”被认为是偿还一笔具体数额的等量债务。在这一点上，“义理”与“义务”大不相同，“义务”对人来说，不论做了多少事也别想达到甚至接近要求，但“义理”就不是无限的。在美国人看来，对原先的恩惠还债是不可思议的，日本人则不这样看。我们觉得他们送礼的方式也十分奇特，每隔半年每个家庭都要精心包装一件礼品作为半年前收到礼物的回赠品；或者某家的女佣也要在一年中给这家送各种各样的礼物来感谢他们雇用了她。但是日本人忌讳回赠过分的厚礼，回赠“纯丝绒”并不代表人的高贵。谈到送礼时人们会说最失策的事就是送礼的人“用海鲷还极鲦鱼”，回报“义理”也是如此。

Whenever possible written records are kept of the network of exchanges, whether they are of work or of goods. In the villages some of these are kept by the headman, some by one of the work-party, some are family and personal records. For a funeral it is customary to bring ‘incense money.' Relatives may also bring colored cloth for funeral banners. The neighbors come to help, the women in the kitchen and the men in digging the grave and making the coffin. In the village of Suye Mura the headman made up the book in which these things were recorded. It was a valued record in the family of the deceased for it showed the tributes of their neighbors. It is also a list which shows those names to which the family owes reciprocal tributes which will be honored when a death occurs?in other families. These are long-term reciprocities. There are also shortterm exchanges at any village funeral just as at any kind of feast. The helpers who make the coffin are fed and they therefore bring a measure of rice to the bereaved family as part payment on their food. This rice too is entered in the headman's record. For most feasts also the guest brings some rice-wine in part payment for the party drinks. Whether the occasion is birth or death, a rice-transplanting, a housebuilding or a social party, the exchange of giri is carefully noted for future repayment.

只要有可能，有关各种来往交易的记录都要保存下来，不管是所做的事还是财物。在农村，这种事一部分由村长负责，一部分则由专人负责，另一部分则由家庭或个人记录。比如一件丧事，按习惯要送“香钱”；亲戚们还要送做幡旗用的五颜六色的布；邻居要前去帮忙，妇女下厨房，男人们挖墓坑和钉棺材。在小村庄里，村长有个本册记载所有这类事情。办丧事的人家往往把这种记录看得十分重要，因为它标明邻居乡亲对自己家的捐助；它也是一份名单，说明这家人所欠的捐助，如果其中哪家死了人就可以有幸偿还了。这些构成了较长久的互惠互报。在任何农村办丧事或各种宴会上也有即时的报答。帮助做棺材的人因为要吃饭，因此他们总带上一把米到办丧事的人家作为饭费的一部分。就连这些米也被村长记录在案。大部分参加宴会的人都带一些米酒作为大家共饮的酒的一份。不论是红白喜事、一次播种，还是家庭或公众聚餐，所包含的“义理”都被小心地记载下来，以便将来报答。

The Japanese have another convention about giri which parallels Western conventions about money repayment. If repayment is delayed beyond due term it increases as if it drew interest. Doctor Eckstein tells a story of this in his dealings with the Japanese manufacturer who financed his trip to Japan to gather material for his biography of Noguchi. Doctor Eckstein returned to the United States to write the book and eventually sent the manuscript to Japan. He received no acknowledgement and no letters. He was naturally troubled for fear something in the volume might have offended the Japanese, but his letters remained unanswered. Some years later the manufacturer telephoned him. He was in the United States, and shortly afterward he arrived at Doctor Eckstein's home bringing with him dozens of Japanese cherry trees. The gift was lavish. Just because it had been held in abeyance so long it was proper that it should be handsome. ‘Surely,' his benefactor said to Doctor Eckstein, ‘you would not have wanted me to repay you?quickly.'

日本人的“义理”习俗与西方人的偿还借债的惯例还有一个相似之处，那就是，如果不能及时偿还，就像能增加利息一样，它的分量也增加。艾克斯坦博士讲过一个这方面的故事。一位日本制造商出旅费，让艾克斯坦博士到日本去收集野口英世的传记资料。回到美国后，博士完成了写作，把手稿寄到日本，他既没得到回音，也没收到信件。他自然而然地担心起书里可能有什么地方冒犯了日本人，他又多次写信，仍得不到任何回音。几年之后，制造商给他打了个电话，说他正在美国，并随后拜访艾克斯坦博士；还带去了几十棵日本樱花树，礼物太丰厚了。正因为如此长久未能报答，所以必须送很隆重的礼物才适当。制造商对艾克斯坦博士说：“不言而喻，你当然不愿让我及早报答你吧。”

A man who is ‘cornered with giri' is often forced into repayments of debts which have grown with time. A man may?apply for assistance to a small merchant because he is the nephew of a teacher the merchant had as a boy. Since as a young man, the student had been unable to repay his giri to his teacher, the debt has accumulated during the passing years and the merchant has to give ‘unwillingly to forestall apology to the world.'

“受义理所迫”的人常常不得不报答随时间延长而增加分量的恩惠。例如，某人因为是某小商人上小学时的老师的侄子，就能够要求小商人给予资助。因为当学生时年纪幼小，还不能报答对老师的“义理”，这笔债就经年历久越积越厚，小商人为了社会交往的体面，不情愿，但必须支付。